Scapegoat

Isn't socialising strange! Blog, you know how in a person–person relationship there is one dominating character and one submissive character? Well I'm usually the submissive one. It's ok, though, I kind-of like it. I feel more comfortable if the other person thinks they have a bit of power. I suppose it makes them more comfortable to be around me. Sometimes it sucks, though! Check this out:

In my house, most of my housemates are socially dominant to me. Which is usually fine! But it has it's problems, such as me being the scapegoat. If something goes wrong I'll get the blame for it. Usually in a funny / non-serious way. For example, our toilet seat broke the other day so people start blaming me for it even though they really don't have a clue. Then they start making-up scenarios of how I did it, and some people probably start truly believing that I did it as the rumor spreads! That's not so fun. But sometimes some people get a bit too high on their power-trip and they get nasty with me. Things start kicking off, and I'm never nasty back, but I become extremely annoying! It's my way of dealing with it, unfortunately. Instead of getting violent back, I end up annoying them so much (in a passive way so that nothing gets physical) that they'll storm off and sulk.

Oh, curse my terrible talent for annoying people!

When I am best friends with someone, I usually annoy them so much after two years of knowing them that we are no longer friends (except some AMAZING best friends! Like Natalie! She's sent from Heaven and we annoy each-other sooo much but we still love each-other). I was explaining this to Speed last year and how, unfortunately, we probably won't be friends for much longer. He told me "don't worry, you'll never get rid of me!" But I think we're getting pretty close to the stage now. He's meeting new friends, you know! Soon he'll leave me and forget all about me.

Did I ever tell you that Speed and I were going to visit my eFriend in America this summer? We got free flights, free accommodation, I was sooo infinitely excited to go!! ...but now Speed has pulled out. Wow! You really can't rely on anyone else to do things in life! I suppose I've only got myself to blame, though. He won't tell me what the reason is but I can imagine that he can't stand me anymore.

Why am I still so hideously annoying! I really felt like I have grown out of it, lately. But I probably haven't... My older sister used to give me 2 pence a day if I didn't annoy her. She hated me SOO MUCH. She would tell me how she will NEVER forgive me, even when we're adults and living on our own. We get along fine now, though. Now that I don't see her very much. I suppose what Hobday said to me is true: I'm only good in moderation. Truly.

....Ahh, I'm going to curl-up and die a little now, blog. I knew you'd understand. Speak to you soon! xx